Are you considering Adoption? Here is some advice that companies won't tell you. Some things you may not even be thinking about. You will get so wrapped up in getting a baby/ giving your baby a "better life," that you need someone to tell you the hard stuff, the truth, the stuff the money grubbing companies won't tell you...
Birth Parents
Are you overwhelmed? Welcome to parenthood. Pressure from your parents, child's father, family, etc to give your child up for adoption? Here are some things to consider first...
~ The moment your child is born, as long as he/she is placed on your chest, you will bond, instantly no matter what.
~No one can ever love your child the way you do.
~If you are a young or teen mom, there are programs funded through the state that will help you finish school, get daycare while you are in school, etc. You can also get more Pell Grants and FAFSA help being a single mother to go to college and to get a degree. This is not your ONLY and life saving option.
~If you are considering open adoption. You are being told that you will get to see your baby every so often. This is not exactly true. What you need to understand is that when you sign your rights away to your child, the new parents aka the "adoptive parents," have all the say so, they make the rules. They may/may not let you see the child. Some may be simply jealous of you or think you may "change your mind," some may simply see you as a threat or think since you are biologically connected that you child will love you more.
~If you are worried about being a single mother. There are plenty of unmarried, single mothers out there and plenty of divorced single mothers out there. They are doing it and you can too. I won't lie it won't be easy. You may have to, for a time get government assistance, BUT no one can love YOUR BABY the way you do.
~Adoption agencies will tell you that the adoptive parents can give your child a life that you can't. Babies don't care about money and stuff, they care about family and YOU. YOU are so important to your child, even if you haven't already given birth to him or her yet. This baby grew inside you and heard YOUR heartbeat. This baby forever loves you and is forever attached to you.
~If you do give your child up for adoption, you will regret it the rest of your life. You may seem fine on the outside, but on the inside you will have a hole so deep in your heart that no one else could ever understand. If/When you decide to have more children you will remember the child you gave away and it will hurt. If you decide on adoption, because of "image" issues...well let me tell you sister, it takes a much stronger woman to raise a baby then to simply give up.
Adoptive Parents
Are you wanting a baby? Are you desperate and feel you HAVE to HAVE a baby to complete your family? Do you already have children and you want to ADD to your family? Here are some thing the adoption agencies that are going to suck your last penny out of you, don't want you to consider...
~Adoption agencies are going to be expensive. You have to also consider the cost of raising the child. Children also don't need money. They need LOVE.
~If you already have kids, then, you will treat your adoptive child differently. You like to think you wouldn't, but you will. If there is a natural disaster and you can only save 1 of your children... you will save YOUR biological child first.
~When you tell your child that he or she was adopted they will want to find their birth parents. This is natural. They want to see who they look like, where they come from, and ask, "Why?" If you don't tell your child they were adopted, they will find out and they will hate you for lying to them their whole life.
~When your child finds his/her biological family, they may end up wanting to be close to them, especially if they have biological siblings. So, you have spent all this money to adopt this child, money to raise it, invested time, and love...but then the child decides to forsake you and leave you when they are older? Are you ready to handle that?
~~If you can't have kids and are considering adoption. Don't do it. Maybe there is a reason God didn't want you to have a baby and no the reason isn't because you can help a motherless child...all children have mothers.
~~If you can't have kids and are considering adoption and are a single mother. Don't do it. If you can't be adult enough to find a significant other and stick by them, well how in the heck do you expect to foster a healthy relationship with a child, who can't tell you their wants and needs?
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I DO NOT SUPPORT ABORTION AND WOULD NEVER, EVER RECOMMEND IT.
I support raising your own kids. Regardless of image, age, money status, or whatever excuse you come up with. There is a way. Thanks for reading.
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